If Luis Figo has seriously been approached, things are a lot worse than I ever imagined. Bear in mind I was imagining quite bad things when Jermaine Pennant’s name was being mentioned without a comedy effect chuckle in an I almost had you kind of way.

Figo looks like an old man and has been playing like one for the last couple of years. He scored 2 goals for Inter in 38 starts and didn’t do a lot else by all accounts. I thought this story was a complete work of fiction to begin with but even the decent papers are running with it. It could well be Harry on a wind up though and to be fair nothing he said gave any indication that he wanted to sign the Portuguese Granddad. It’s still worrying though.

Pennant has a bit of talent, is still fairly young and is English but he’s another one of that all too common breed of footballer, a brain dead. He’s been at more clubs than Jamie O’Hara and Danielle Lloyd and gets himself in so much bother; he’ll be on Danny Dyer’s Deadliest Proper Geezers before long.

We’ve dodged the biggest bullet of all already this summer by not signing Djibril Cisse. Fingers crossed we can avoid a couple more.